Lessons in Living Comfortably: Embrace the Scratches and Dents
Do you remember when English country style was all the rage? I pored over magazine photos of chintz-filled homes, with their centuries-old furniture and baker's-dozen dogs sprawled across rich silk cushions. But what enticed me most was the tattered upholstery, the scratched and dented floors, the chests with peeling paint, and the comfort, character and welcome that those rooms exuded.
Wear and tear can make Americans uncomfortable. "Eeek! It's a scratch! Aarrgghh, it's a dent!" The gentle damage of day-to-day life can make us want to put velvet ropes around certain rooms in our homes. The ropes might be removed for special occasions, but it still feels like you're living in a museum and it ruins the welcome we want our family and guests to experience.
Maybe we can learn from our English forbears. Let's embrace the character and warmth — including the scratches and dents — that inevitably result when we actually live in our rooms.
When we choose furniture that's already distressed, it takes away the agony of that first mar or scratch. When grandsons run their metal trucks across your brand new coffee table (trust me, it happens), or some big dude plops down and puts his feet up, it's no problem. Actually, the fact that someone feels comfortable enough to put their feet up means my interior decorating has accomplished its purpose.
Let's make one thing clear: Embracing a we-actually-live-here style does not mean that you have to love the Shabby Chic look! Quite the contrary. This sleek, contemporary room is made welcoming by the distressed coffee table while still remaining sleek and contemporary. But cover the coffee table with your thumb and you have a much different space.
Remove the distressed black cabinet from this bathroom, and the character of the space changes dramatically. The scars on this functional piece give the loo a lived-in, comfortable feel.
One of the most basic elements of your home — the floor — can make an immediate and unmistakable statement. Can you imagine a "Please take your shoes off" sign at this front door? Rather, this floor says, "Please don't worry about your high heels or muddy tennis shoes. I just want you to come in and get comfortable." Plus, don't you love the colorful contemporary furniture with this floor? Very well done.
I totally understand if a worn painted floor is not your cup of tea. But don't dismiss the idea outright. A stained floor can just as easily have built-in age, warmth and welcome. Consider using a wide plank, like those pictured here. They are inherently more homey than narrow oak strips and are readily available, even in laminate. Check out Armstrong or Pergo for some great, affordable options.
OK, I know this is the third photo of floors I've shown you. But floors are such an important part of this subject that I can't help myself. If your floor shows serious wear and tear, rejoice! But if you are an inveterate and determined do-it-yourselfer, you can spiff up your floor with paint while retaining its "you can't hurt me so don't worry" look. Do not go for opaque and shiny — you want a slightly worn appearance.
Once the paint is thoroughly dry, finish with a couple of coats of polyurethane and you will have a durable but very family-friendly floor. Diamonds really are a girl's best friend!
Embracing scratches and dents opens up all kinds of budget-friendly shopping venues. Flea markets, antique stores, thrift stores and barn sales are some of my favorite places to shop because what I find there will already be well-used. When I repurpose it for my home (like using these vintage doors as a headboard), not only will I decorate on a dime, I will immediately make clear that no one has to walk on eggshells in my home.
The older I get, the klutzier I become. But when I'm hanging a picture above a chest like this one and I drop the hammer, and then the nails and then the picture itself, at least I don't have to swear at myself! There is nothing I can do to it that won't enhance its look — a few more bumps and dents won't hurt a bit. (If only my body were the same way.)
Don't be leery of taking your lived-in style outside. These flea market chairs have been painted a sunny color that is clearly unafraid of rain or snow. And they are easily folded away. The table is a warm, rustic wood that happily invites you to sit down and stay awhile. Pieces like these positively radiate personality and style. You can find old folding chairs at almost any thrift store, then paint them your favorite color. Or Google "vintage metal folding chairs" and while away the hours browsing.
Ever so discreetly, timeworn furniture hints at history. I wonder if this primitive table came out of Grandpa's barn or served in Great-Aunt Martha's kitchen during the Depression. In reality, it may have fallen off the back of a truck last week, or been a fantastic garage sale find. Whatever its origin, the dents and scratches make me curious.
Do not hesitate to create your own well-worn pieces. The chest in our bedroom is very much like the one in this picture. I found ours at a yard sale, moldering in the California sun. The stain was old and faded, but the chest's bones were good. I took off the original hardware and cleaned it a bit — but not too much! After some selective sanding, I painted the chest a soft spa-blue color, using latex paint. After it thoroughly dried, I sanded off the paint in areas where wear would naturally occur, like the edges of drawers and the sides and corners of the cabinet. I finished by rubbing in Briwax, which is a wonderful paste wax. It protects and adds great patina while slightly muddying and aging the color.
Why do I think embracing wear and tear is so important? It's because great interior design is not hands-off, and is not meant to impress or intimidate. Great design causes anyone who enters your home — including your own kids — to feel welcome, valuable, nurtured. When our homes and furnishings say, "Look, life happens, and we are just fine with that," people are immediately put at ease. The old trunk in this room is just one well-worn piece, but it says, "Make yourself comfy. You are more important than our stuff."